Thursday, June 28, 2007

The Morning After on TSE - 6.28.2007

Between new names, ex-girlfriends and a new layout, a lot of things get lost in this, the daily shuffle of our lives here at TSE. We knew, of course that our dramatic prose, our cunning linguistic skills (giggity) and rapist's wit would eventually find its way outside these walls. And it finally has.

This is Dave Heller. He's a rather strapping man (Teeple: "he looks like Brad Garrett on meth") whose job it is to scan across the Internets looking for anything written about the Wisconsin (here we go again) Badgers in the local and national media for JSOnline, the online home of the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel. Apparently his job title is "sports producer" so if you want to get paid to blog and read blogs all day, then you want Dave's job. Anyway, he found the article that Jed--I mean Joe Table Blew It (JTBI, heretofore) wrote about Bret Bielema and his status as "Public Enemy No. 1 in Bloomington, IN". Here, the words of Mr. Heller:

The author, Jed DeMuesy, has declared Bret Bielema public enemy No. 1, apparently for Wisconsin's big win at Indiana last season, which also happened to be Terry Hoeppner's return to the Hoosiers.

Maybe DeMusey should be mad at Indiana. The Hoosier came out with a lot of emotion that day, but they quickly bungled things up with penalties and turnovers and all that emotion disappeared and probably worked against them.

Never mind that Heller spelled Jed's--I mean JTBI's name incorrectly (that's probably why he's the producer and not the editor, and thank God for that) and never mind the fact that no one here has ever, will ever or currently matriculates at Indiana University, though that has been the assumption since the original post. The point here is that no one from the bassackwards state of Wisconsin knows how to read anything. They can read into pretty much everything but when it comes to deciphering actual meaning, you're better off going to one of the Dakotas. The point of the article is, for the umpteenth fucking time, and say it with me now:


Jesus Christ. We've determined that no one from Wisconsin can either read or spell but this is getting re-goddamn-diculous. But, we thank Hellre (how do you like it, buddy?) for the free press and publicity. Sitemeter says all 23 people in Wisco that can operate a computer without reenacting that scene from Zoolander, have been frequenting our lovely site. We keep this up and the sky's the limit.

And happy birthday to KSK. Keep up the good work.

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