Live Blog... San Antonio v. Utah Second Half

I figured I would give this a try, just to see how hard/fun it is. I am in SUCH a bad mood after the Tribe just got hosed in Fenway, but oh well. All times Eastern Standard.

10:33-- Greg Popovich just told Michelle Tafoya they need to do a good job rebounding in the second half. Awesome.

10:34-- Deron Williams draws a foul on Bruce Bowen. Willams is OWNING Bowen in this series, doing things that Steve Nash couldn't do... this kid is going to be the next great point guard for sure. Lookforward to me stroking him all second half.

10:38- Andrei Kirilinko heading to the line, makes one of two. Don't feel bad for him though, he still gets one gal a year.

10:39- Willams to Carlos Boozer for a deuce... talk about the second coming of Stockton Malone, these two guys will single handedly keep Utah in the playoffs for the next 10 years

10:42- Refs make the correct call in awarding the ball to the Spurs. I tell you what, it seems to me that the refs this postseason in the NBA have really done a dencet job. The refs have stopped letting these crybabies walk all over them this year. Now I know they have had some rough calls in the Cavs- Pistons series, but I think that the refs are stating to assert themselves again for the first time in years.

10:44- Commercial time, and none of them will be Tyler Perry's House of Payne. Fantastic. I can't tell you how not funny that show looks and it hurts to watch the Cavs because of those commercials. You know it has to be bad when a cable network waits until the summer to give it a whirl.


10:48- Boozer just destroyed Tim Duncan and then dropped an 8 foot bunny on the other end. Man am I pissed he left Cleveland, but you have to respect the way the guy plays the game. May go down as the best pro player out of Duke, you just watch.


10:50: Marc Jackson just ruined the repay of the Boozer swat... I tried not to listen, but I think he threw in at least two "big fellas"


10:51-- There were just two awful comments, one by Mike Breen, the other by Jeff Van Gundy. Breen just said that Duncan likes to quiet a home crowd as the place was going NUTS... he then had to follow it up by correcting himself... then JVG just said that Stockton way will have to be re-named Stockton-Williams way, as if there is only one street in Utah.



10:59- End of the third, and Utah is back in this one. The ball is in Tony Parker's court in the fourth, because Williams is asserting himself as the best point guard in this game.


11:00- Katherine Heigl looks amazing in this movie "Knocked Up" how does the studio expect us to believe that the dude from the 40 year old version scored her? Not buying it. And theres no way he would be lucky enough to slip one past the goalie with her.

11:04- JVG: "This unit for Utah has to find some way to score the ball" I wonder why Houston fired him as thier head coach?

11:05- Jerry Sloan gets T'ed up... a delayed reaction to the Bryon Russel no-call I can only assume.

11:06- Matt Harpring hits a fader, he's also one heck of an engineer.

11:08- Can someone explain to me why Jacque Vaughn is in the game right now for the Spurs? You don't see the Cavs playing Scot Pollard right now. Come on, get serious... I'd rather play with four.

11:12- Commercial. We're getting dangerously close to Tim Duncan time. He's done it before, and he has about three or four more years left to do it. This Boozer-Duncan matchup is fun to watch, because both men think they can get it done against the other. The question is: can Boozer actually stare Tim Duncan down? Many of great caliber have tried, and very few have actually done it.

11:15- How bad does Mike Breen want to say "Oh boy! Oberto with the lay-in!"

11:17- Jazz are imploding because too many people who aren't Deron Williams are trying to make things happen. And as I type this, Williams makes a sweet dish to AK-47.Oh and by the way, is there a player other than john Salley that doesn't deserve his rings more than Derek Fisher? He has never been better than maybe a six on the talent scale. In fact, the only thing I can remember him doing is burying that floater with .4 left against the Spurs while he was a Laker. Thats the equivalent of the Dave Roberts steal for the Red Sox, except Fisher milked that play for three rings, not just one. Awful.

11:24- Duncan is owning Boozer, he is now shooting his fifth and sixth free throws of the quarter. I'll give it to this Utah crowd... they are still right in this game even though I am pretty much writing off thier teams chances.

11:25- Derek Fisher just fouled Manu Manu while shooting a three. Someone get Jerry buss on the phone, he needs to pry that ring off of his baby mama's finger.

11:26- Finally, Williams deciding to assert himself and take the ball ahrd to the lane. Marc Jackson just pointed out for probably the fifth time in two minutes that the Spurs are forcing Willams to make mistakes. We get it.

11:28- The Spurs are just so savvy, they know how to win games, they are simply asseting themselves on the offensive end, getting to the free throw line, and dominating on the boards.

11:29- Derek Fisher just got a technical. Wow, I mean when I'm right, I'm right.

11:31- Linda Cohn hosting the show tonight, looks like I'm going to HBO On Demand.

11:32- Jerry Sloan gets tossed from the game. Pretty ridiculous how the Spurs really are just owning the Jazz right now. You can say what you want about how all thier guys play dirty and how Tim Duncan's underratedness is overrated, but this team is calculating in their execution. I mean, Mehmet Okur just fouled Oberto with three ticks left to go on the shot clock. This right now is like being Keiser Soze and just watching everyone else go nuts around you while you remain cool and collected. The Spurs are Kevin Spacy right now.

11:37- Derek Fisher just got tossed! Did I really just do that to him?! He just dropped the coffee cup right now after he just saw that the blackboard was made in Skokie.

11:38- Ahhh those cute Mormons give us the old "refs you suck" chant. Gotta love the effort. Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb

11:40- Michelle Tayfoya gets no post game interview as the Jazz fans are throwing "debris" on the court. We have a phrase for that in Clevelnad: third quarter.

Well, that's it! It was a good time doing my first live blog, and quite an experience watching the Spurs just own the fourth quarter. This series is essentially over, but Utah fans have a lot to look forward to with the Williams-Boozer combo. I'll catch you tomorrow with a little Cavs game four preview as only I could bring it to you. more...

With Apologies to ESPN Classic...

As a staunch Cleveland Cavaliers fan, I am happy to see that the Cavs have at least made a series of this Eastern Conference finals, winning game three by staving off a late Piston run, on the back of Lebron James, who hit some very tough shots down the stretch to gave the Q faithful something to cling to. It has become apparent that win or lose, this series, win on lose, will most dramatically effect how Lebron, above everyone else on either team, is remembered this off-season. I can't stand it, it just isn't fair. This kid is one of the top five players in the league, but that is never good enough for the media, and it never will be.

Now, I know the series isn't over, and that the Cavs should really be winning this series considering how badly the Piston backcourt is playing, but I present to you, in the first of a continuing Monday segment, the Top Five Reasons you can't blame Lebron James for losing to the Detroit Pistons.

5. The Dwayne Wade factor.

This guy kind of ruined for all young superstars. He was the leader of the Miami Heat team that won the Championship a year ago, and played remarkably. If you look back on the regular seasons Wade had last year and Lebron had this year, the results are remarkable.

Wade's line last year: 27.2 PPG, 5.7 RPG, 6.7 APG

Lebron this year: 27.3 PPG, 6.7 RPG, 6.0 APG

Pretty damn similar. So, what was the difference? Without a question, it was Shaquille O'Neal. Shaq during the regular season last year averaged about six more points as Wade's number two than Lebron's number two did, Larry Hughes. For those of you who will say that six points is pretty negligible, I would contend that number one it isn't, and number two, the two games that the Cavs have lost so far in the Eastern Conference finals? You guessed it, a combined 6 points. Also, last year in the playoffs, the Miami Heat only had one game--one game!-- where they scored less than 80 points, the Cavs this year have two in this series alone. The Shaq factor is even bigger when you consider how you have to account for him on every offensive series. The Cavs cannot claim that they have someone of a similar caliber.

In addition to Shaq, Wade led a group of players that were hungry. Antoine Walker, who was written off as a failure after not leading the Celtics to thier 17th world championship. Gary Payton, at one time the best point guard in the game, a player that had come so close to tasting the Larry O'Brien trophy at the height of his career in Seattle. Alonzo Mourning, the face of the Miami Heat, whose return to the NBA after his health issues meant only one thing: he wanted to win the big one. The Cavs have Donyell Marshall. Oh, and would you rather have Mike Brown, or Pat Riley leading your team? Thought so.

Lebron and Wade will always be measured together, along with Carmelo Anthony, since they were all taken within two picks of each other in 2003. Wade set the bar for for the other two, but taking a closer look as we just did will make you realize that Wade wasn't the one man wrecking machine he is sometimes made out to be.

4. The State of the NBA

This is not your father's NBA, or even your older brothers. There also is a transition currently happening in the NBA that puts a premium on athleticism more than ever before. It was back in the 80's if you would have a player like Magic Johnson, you would almost always be in the Finals, if not winning the Championship every year, because he was leaps and bounds ahead of anyone athletically in the game at that time. Now? There is no one player that can dominate a game like Magic, or MJ did, because there is just so much more athletic talent spread out across the league. For example, look at what the Warriors did to the Mavericks. How did they win that series? Better athletes. The talent pool is deeper now. The problem is that even though this is true, there are still those that look to Lebron or Kobe or whoever to be the next overarching mega-superstar. Kobe Bryant went for more than 50 a crazy number of times this year and not a single human being with a brain picked the Lakers over the Suns this year in the playoffs. The superstars in this league, and those that will follow will always be playing in the shadows of players who played during a time where having a big time center was the order of the day, and those teams that had a player with great athleticism could overcome a team that had a Ewing or a Hakeem. The league has changed, the legends still linger.

3. Mike Brown

This guy has no idea how to run a NBA squad. He is an exalted assistant coach who should no have the responsibility of coaching one of the greatest players of the day. Now I could get into all of his faults, which are many, but I would like to maybe just point out that all great superstars that have won Championships have been led by Hall of Fame coaches. Riley got magic and Wade thier rings, Phil Jackson got it done for Michael, Shaq, and Kobe. Red Auerbach was pulling all the strings for those great Celtic teams in the 80's. And Gregg Popovich, who has a better playoff winning percentange than any of the coaches I just mentioned, is on his way to leading Tim Duncan to his third ring. Charles Barkley never made it to the promised land. Why? You tell me... can you name the coach who led the Suns to the '93 finals? Paul Westphal. Now I can see the chicken and the egg argument, but lets just say that I'm pretty sure it is a no brainer the Cavs fans would feel a lot more comefortable with a Hall of Fame coach pacing the sidelines, rather than one who is as unproven as the players he is coaching.

2. His teammates

Jordan was the most talented player ever to grace an NBA floor, and everyone knows that he had Scottie Pippen that made that team legitimate. But you know who else Jordan had? He had other players on his teams who knew what their roles were. John Paxon hit the game winning shot to beat the Suns, Steve Kerr did the same things to drop the Jazz. These were two players who knew why they were on the team, and knew that when they were called upon, they were expected to execute. Too many Cavs think that they can just allow Lebron to take all of the blame, with the caveat that he gets all of the credit as well. Now, Jordan had a reputation of instilling fear into the hearts of his teammates if they didn't succeed for him. Lebron doesn't have that, but in no way should he be held responsible for Larry Hughes missing a six footer or Donny Marshall not nailing a wide open three. These players are older than him, and they are also professional basketball players that shouldn't need Lebron James' motivation to do something they are paid millions to do. There is nobody on this team that really plays with any type of consistency. The crew around Wade and MJ, as mentioned were far superior.

1. Cleveland

This city is so hungry for a title, so desperate for a taste of glory, yet so used to being dissapointed. It has been well documented, and re-hashed over and over again. Detriot is a familiar foe, and all things being equal, they tend to beat the Cavs. Cavs fans know this, and can become disheartened very quickly when ti comes to the support of the team. The Game five crowd for the Nets game was pathetic. Lebron is expected to not only raise this team, but also this city, all while dealing with an inferior team, coach and-- oh yeah-- the Pistons. Lebron has a lot fo growing up to do and his best years are still ahead of him, I just hope that some of the blame can be spread out among the peasants in King James' court.

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Wraping it up...

"Do you wanna dance?

With you?

No...With my father?

I'm Roger.

They call me...they call me...Mimi"

***************************

I'm in no way against drunken voice mails at the wee hours of the morning (just ask your ex-girlfriend - HEY-OHHHHHHHH) but I am rather perplexed by one I received last night. It was from fellow sports elitist JTBI who called me while singing a song from the mid 90s musical "Rent". The lyrics are above. And it wasn't one of the better-known songs, like "Seasons of Love" or "What you Own" (which everyone knows, admit it or not). It was from the song, "Would you Light my Candle". I would have assumed he would have sent me a VM of him singing "We Built This City" or maybe a bar from Phil Collins's immortal classic, "Easy Lover", but a rather obscure song from "Rent"? Your best guess.

Anyway, here are some links to finish our day:

• Deadspin.com's Cultural Oddsmaker

http://deadspin.com/sports/dong/who-will-win-the-2007-scripps-national-spelling-bee-261487.php

While this isn't the current Oddsmaker (I get the feeling AJ Daulerio is swimming in a pool of his own [insert bodily fluid here] as we speak, hence no update this week yet) last week's was a gem.

• A "tribute" to ESPN Classic

http://futureconsiderations.blogspot.com/2007/05/rip-espn-classic.html

Future Considerations watched ESPN Classic and found nothing (save for American Gladiators, naturally) classic at all.

• Dan Shanoff's new blog

http://www.varsitydad.com/

While I really don't like Dan Shanoff too much, this is an interesting blog and may be promising enough to merit my time while I'm at work.

• Cheerleader of the Week on KSK

http://kissmesuzy.blogspot.com/2007/05/im-just-mad-about-saffron-saffrons-mad.html

This is by far the best football blog out there due, mainly, to their lack of football-related posts and the incredibly good use of foul language and storytelling, in that order. This is pretty funny, but then again, the whole blog is. Read on.

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Meanwhile, in the Real World...

I work in an office where I get paid to write blog entries and check my e-mail enter judgements into computers for 8 hours a day. It's good work, and I appreciate it, if only for the paycheck that ultimately fuel my insatiable Private Dancer addiction. But I digress; what follows is a list of people who have funny names and are stupid enough to try and evade both the G-Men at the State of Ohio Department of Taxation and myself. That said, here is the (ongoing) Top However Many Names Filed while working...wherever it is I work. I'll try to keep these sports-related, but some are just too good not to mention.

Here we go.

1. James Dickhaus
That name is Legen...wait for it...and I hope you're not lactose intolerant because the last part is...dary.

2. Butz Hacker Company, Incorporated.
Where the Employee of the Month gets more than just a parking space...

3. William Hanrahan
I have it on good authority that his wife's a dyke. Any Slap Shot fans out there?

4. Gary A. and Roberta D Coon
Before anyone asks, they aren't on this list because their last name may or may not be a racial slur. They are here because they represent case no. ###69, which is funny because I have the maturity of a 4th grader and I still laugh at that number and add "that's what she said" to wherever appropriate.

5. Kheire K. Khatab
I'm treading on the lines of racism, again, I know, but that's never a good set of initials to have. Ever.

6. Porta John Corporation
Not really that funny, but I bet they think the $47,220.51 sales tax lien against them is full of shit*.

*that's a terrible pun, even for me

More to come... more...

Uh-Oh Time in the Mistake by the Milake

I have watched zero minutes of the NBA's Eastern Conference Finals series between the Cavs and the Pistons. This is due, mainly, to the fact that I am broke, have no cable and usually drift off to sleep around 11:30, drug-induced or "Frasier" rerun-induced (where would we be without broadcast television). That said, I find it fitting that the game was on TNT last last night and was the lead in for either of the two shows that network airs. If I may...

Without a Trace
The way in which the Cavs and, from an outsider standpoint, having seen nary a minute of this series, the way in which LeBron James, God in Nikes, has disappeared in this series.

And, of course...

Cold Case
The only way to describe the whereabouts of the fire that the Cavs had last year during their playoff run.

There was something so refreshing about last year's Eastern Conference Semis, in that the Pistons, heavy favorites though they were, had to claw back into the series because LBJ and a bunch of other Cavs decided to take them for a ride through seven games. The Pistons eventually won, as raSHEED predicted, but not without winning back-to-back elimination games. But has a team ever looked as physically or emotionally dead as the Cavs in this years playoffs? The beat the Hibachi-less Wizards in four uninspiring games, had to win in NJ to beat the Nets in six, and about probably going to lose this series in sweeping fashion.

LeBron James needs to wake his team up and the best way to do it is to wake himself up. 19-7-6 are great regular season numbers. These are the playoffs, as Ari Gold has reminded us countless times in the commercials. If the best young talent in the NBA, the manchild the Cavs need to lead the team, can't get over 20 in the playoffs then I doubt that team will have much of a shot. Especially with the current supporting cast around him.

The series resumes on Sunday in Cleveland and some people say that a series isn't over until you win on the road. LeBron James better prove those people right, or this series it's going to be over and we will all be back to Without a Trace reruns on TNT faster than you can say Anthony LaPaglia.

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Edits

I'm dumb. Here are the corrections, as noted by the italics and asterisks, to my miserable errors from the previous post.

* Milwaukee Bucks.

** catalyst that ignites the Bucks and sends Michael Redd, the most underrated player in the game, to the playoffs (or perhaps even further (??)).

And, of course, I was dead freaking wrong about pretty much the entire draft. At least Greg Oden looks old enough to be tried as an adult in Portland, where he will, if he's a real team player, probably be arrested for some kind of drug-related crime. And it looks like Durrant is headed to Seattle, home of rain, Elizabeth Hasselbeck's husband and perennial WNBA powerhouse, the Seattle ________ (I don't know the actual name of the "franchise" but go ahead and be creative). more...

Ping Pong balls Should be Saved for Throwing in Cups of Beer and Sports Television Programming Should Feature ACTUAL SPORTS!

I've never been too much a fan of "sports" on television, that is to say, what the likes of ESPN or, for lack of, well, any other sports outlet, says is sports (watching two idiots with dumb nicknames play MADDEN in Times Square is cool, but it is hardly an activity, forget if it is a sport or not). Which is why I'm not all too excited about tonight's NBA draft lottery.

I'm not a fan of the NBA and I much prefer the college game and the madness in the year's third month to a playoff system that knocks out the two best teams in the league before the finals begin and somehow still has Carlos Boozer playing this late into May. But the more important playoff system, I'd argue, is the game that the bottom 4 teams in the league play over the last 20 games of the season. I know that flopping has become the recent trend in basketball, and I'm okay with a few players falling on their faces from time to time, if only for entertainment purposes. But when entire teams do it for the chance at selecting first, then that is problem number one for the NBA. Don't tell me the Memphis Grizzlies or the Boston Celtics weren't good enough to win at a better clip down the stretch. It was a pathetic limping-in session done by the bottom rung of teams, and that always cracks me up, as well, because you can suck to high heaven for the last two months of the season and only have a shot at getting the number 1 overall pick.

Pardon the tangent there. I guess I do enjoy the irony of losing by losing, but I hate that the NBA draft lottery, the NBA draft and, for that matter, the NFL draft (at a whopping 6+ hours for the FIRST ROUND) are made into appointment television by the networks. And the World Wide Leader is most responsible. I know they just showed a BoSox/Yankees game but would it hurt to throw another on? Are there other teams playing tonight? Why not show some sports on the premier sports network and dump the draft LOTTERY (not even the draft, this is the draft to find out which teams draft which players in which order) to the deuce or to News. a modest proposal.

Anyway, as I have opinions about everything, I may as well throw up a prediction for how this thing's going to go down. Let's face it - this thing is rigged to high heaven and, just like when Ewing came out in 1985, a major Eastern city has the chance to grab the premier center of the last 20 years. That said...

Boston will "win" (if you want to even call it that) the draft lottery, virtually locking up former Ohio State man child, father of 2 and 33 year old Greg Oden (whom, I assume, in the picture, is hitting that or did very shortly after) as their new franchise player. I shudder to think what will happen if the TWolves* get the second pick and use it on a player like Kevin Durrant, who may be the excuse to dump the other Kevin** to a place where he can finally win a ring. You heard it here first. more...